Colour Me Confused

This is something that’s confused the hell out of me for a while now: why have so many states passed laws which prevent co-habiting couples from adopting when many of them have no issue at all with a single person (gay or straight, in most cases) adopting? What exactly is it that about the addition of a long-term partner that suddenly makes a household an unsuitable place for raising children? And why are so many religious groups interested in these laws? (Apart from the obvious ‘benefit’ of stopping gay couples from adopting, but again, these laws do not prevent gay people adopting – only couples.)

And in case anyone thinks those are rhetorical questions, they’re not; I genuinely want to know.

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6 Responses to “Colour Me Confused”


  1. 1 Zack January 6, 2009 at 10:02 pm

    It seems too be the usual doublethink employed by those who laws founded in religious belief. As for the actual mechanics of it, I can only guess it has something to do with a difference in the rights of individuals as apposed to rights of couples. That and/or to make it seem that legal rights is something one can agree to disagree on.

  2. 2 Zack January 6, 2009 at 10:03 pm

    Pardon me, its “those who push for laws founded in religios belief. Please excuse the typo.

  3. 3 augustine January 6, 2009 at 10:06 pm

    No problem, I’m sure I have plenty of uncaught typos lurking around on this blog.

    Recently I’ve been told that statistics indicate that unmarried couples make worse parents than married ones, enough to justify excluding them from having adoption rights. I’m still waiting on links to the studies in question.

  4. 4 Dana C. Larocca January 7, 2009 at 3:55 am

    I think the objection to gay couples adopting comes from the same place as the objection to gay couples getting married. In a sense each of these social changes makes “us” more like “them.” Yet they perceive it to be in their interest, and, inter alia, in the interest of society for “us” to remain on the fringe.

    I remember a time when white folk would get their knickers all twisted when a black family would move into the neighborhood. They would whine about “property values” like the reactionaries of today whine about “family values.”

    I think religious groups rally behind these laws because these laws stigmatize gay relationships. They fear gay relationships. I don’t understand it either. I think they fail to grasp the obvious: All of these unwanted children were conceived by heterosexual persons.

  5. 5 augustine January 7, 2009 at 1:44 pm

    As vile as the thinking behind it is, I could understand a flat-out ban of gay couples adopting. What confuses me is the fact that most of these prohibitions simply stop co-habiting couples – straight or gay – from adopting. Are heterosexual, co-habiting couples simply unavoidable collateral damage?

  6. 6 New Allie August 10, 2010 at 7:50 pm

    To focus on someone else, or a lot of someone “elses,” takes the heat off themselves. I am now with a transgender male, though because of health problems, he hasn’t gone through any medical changes. So, he still looks female and legally is female. That makes us a same sex couple. I only wish I had raised my children in as much love as I have now.

    http://suddenlygay.wordpress.com


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